S–t Happens! NYC porch pirate victims put out decoy poop packages for thieves
Queens residents fed up with porch pirates swiping their packages are filling boxes with dog and cat poop and placing them on their doorsteps, hoping the thieves take the bait.
In a video shared on a neighborhood app, a woman wearing an orange parka with the hood pulled up walks by a house, looks up and sees a package, then quickly rushes up the front steps.
From there, she swiftly snatches the box with her left hand, before turning around and fleeing the scene with her supposed score — oblivious to the box’s true contents.
“We put poop in that box . . . Hope they enjoy it,” the Astoria resident, who shared the footage from their front door security camera wrote, in a video now viewed upwards of 1,000 times.
It seems the Astoria homeowner is not the only one resorting to crap traps.
“I put cat litter in mine,” another neighbor commented beneath the video.
The drastic measures appear to be effective, according to at least one resident.
“I have done this before (last summer) and thieves just stopped coming to our block,” commented someone else.
Another neighbor meanwhile said they pulled the stunt using four days’ worth of poop.
Sometimes the sh-t hits the fan.
Last year, Queens homeowner Carlos Mejia, fed up with package thieves, started leaving “decoy packages” outside his door to lure the thugs — and one day stormed out of his house wielding a baseball bat to confront a perp.
Porch pirates are a serious nuisance in the Big Apple: a staggering 90,000 packages are stolen a day, according to city officials, while the average household gets at least one delivery a week and 20% get at least four weekly packages.
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